Last Days...

I know its unusual for me to blog on a weekend but today marks the last day of something epic in my life. Well world..."man" has finally moved. Pause~ It has been a long haul and I thank all those who have been on this tireless journey with me. Play~ And in retrospect the separation wasn't as I thought it would be BUT its clear for my sanity it had to happen.

You know the old saying "hindsight is always 20/20"..well I'm in full hindsight mode. Yesterday afternoon as he packed the smaller items and then bagged the remaining clothes I started to remember those happy times we had. Pause~ "man" and I had been together for 10 years. So its easy to fall into those moments. Play~ And upon watching the last piece of paper and final shirt go into a bag I realized we had finally reached the end of a long tireless journey. Now post him leaving, I felt a wave of emotions. The first was overall excitement. I mean who wouldn't be elated!?!? I had finally cleansed him physically out of the space. Then the second and third emotion that followed was fear and overall uncertainty. Pause~ As stated in previous posts there has been a great deal going on health-wise with me. So it has been a long scary road that continues. Play~

However, moving past those feelings were simple and somewhat effortless. And upon thinking about it I realized that I had finally done it. I'M...COMPLETELY...OVER.."MAN." Like OVER HIM! No more anger, no more hurt, no more worry...just FREEDOM from those emotions. So like most recent Sundays , I came over to my moms house to let her look over some things and discuss the weeks health happenings. And I told her about "mans" move. And she immediately pointed to my ring finger on my right hand. Below is how the conversation went.

Mom: So he's gone and its over why are you still wearing that ring?

Annie P: Because its mine.

Mom: But that's a symbol of something that is no longer. It doesn't even fit anymore. Somethings are inherent [Annie P]

Annie P: So mom what I am supposed to wear on this finger? Pause~ I rarely change my jewelry hence the question. Play~

Mom: You want a ring? I have one sitting in my room waiting for you. Pause~ Yikes wasn't expecting that answer. Play~

Annie P: Oh...ok..well give it to me.

- End Scene -

As you can tell I wasn't prepared for that answer from her. I was thinking that she would just say "when you are ready to take it off you can take it off." However, in true Mrs. P fashion she cut me right at the ankles and put a new beautiful ring on my finger. Pause~ This is the part I love about my mother. She has no time for the nurturing aspects that most people do. When shes finished with something she is finished. Play~ So I'm now wearing this gorgeous ring from my moms hand and I have now realized...I have reached the end. These past two days are in fact the last days of something that needed to end a while ago.

In conclusion, I guess I have realized that in any break up there are hard times but when you reach the end you are at peace. However, the peace that you (or at least I) thought would come was not a hands up, fist opening moment. Instead it was a quiet apartment and a beautiful ring. Hmm who would have thought.
Well happy Sunday loves! Until tomorrow's post!

Annie P