Technology Friend or Foe

So after such a serious post earlier, I wanted to grace you all with a question that will reveal a love later. So for instance, my "suitor" has text messaged me for the day to make chit chat. What's interesting about this dating and "alter ego" thing is that my suitor has decided to ask EVERY SINGLE TIME if I will write about him. Now even though this should be annoying, surprisingly it is not because I find it intriguing that he wants other people to know about him BUT states he can not date a woman with "two lives." But I digress..

Anyway, this post is focused on an interesting conversation I had with one of my best best best male friends this afternoon who we shall call "Rich." During my walk to Au Bon Pain for lunch, "Rich" sent me a text that said "Check my Facebook post now." So of course I went and it was a posting professing his love for his girlfriend. Pause~ I have been fortunate to have a group of friends for over ten years. In this group, we have grown up together. And by "we," I mean myself and six now men. However, what makes our friendships so genuine is that there is no sexual tension and no one is interested in anyone else. So very refreshing! Play~ So post reading this post, there were a series of events that occurred. 1) I commented (of course!) 2) sent him a text back stating I needed deets asap and 3) shot a text to "man" to make sure that he knew our friend was in peril.

Well upon hearing the story, the post was meant to respond to some bottom feeders who have been harassing him and his girlfriend. And when speaking to "Rich," it made me reflect on my current situation with "man." Pause~ Before I tell the remainder of this story, I want everyone to know that Annie P DOES NOT GIVE ADVICE! The reason being, 1) I am not in the relationship with both parties, 2) if my advice goes wrong who is to blame...me and 3) I am solutions based! So tell me you want to get to point A or B and I can help brainstorm to get there Play~ And I had to say to "Rich," listen a lesson I have taken from my long long courtship with "man" is that no one will ever want to see two successful people be happy. In general, when individuals (man or woman) see two people who are grinding, saving and making moves there is usually a part of them that burns because its not them. Usually, 97% of the silent haters will ignore and move on. BUT there is the dastardly 3% that will make it their lot in life to make your life difficult!

So now we come to meat of the matter, with the digital age we live in stalking has been taken to a new high! Now we have people who can stalk via free text apps, fake Gmail email accounts, fake Facebook and Twitter profiles, Google phones and whatever else. And the question I have is, has technology become a friend or foe? I know in my personal situation with "man" technology is def a foe! Pause AGAIN~ For those who know Annie P...you know I do NOT respond to bullies; however, at this point I am taking a page from my good friend, Fatal Angel, and "bowing out gracefully." I have no place in this fight...too much to lose. Play~ I hate technology so much that even hearing my phone vibrate makes me cringe! Not because I am afraid of what is coming through BUT because I know what is coming and who it is coming from is meant to ruin/taint/hurt me.  Therefore, in speaking with "Rich" it became apparent that in this stage of life...those who attain true happiness have to keep it between the few the trust and to themselves.

So on to the love: Happiness is deserved but should not be shared to many! Your happiness is for who?..YOU that's right! Those who love you will see it, make light and move on with you.

Until next time,
Annie P (BIG SMILES ON THE INSIDE)

Go to the mattresses!

Well blog land...today my love is short and sweet...Love: "Go to the mattresses!"

Because I know that some of you are unfamiliar, this quote comes from the movie "The Godfather." At the point in which this quote was stated, Sonny & Clemenza are discussing whether it was time to fly into all out war.

History: It was an Italian custom to temporarily move to an undisclosed apartment and borrow mattresses for soldiers (or mobsters) to sleep on while protecting the vacated apartment from possible attack. "Go to the mattresses" was a reference for preparing for the move.

Pause ~ Many do not know but I love love love movies! However, "The Godfather" is not my modern day "hood Bible" Play~

So I know you are wondering why I have taken this dramatic turn in just 24 hours. Well readers, in the past week or so there have been a great deal of new things in my life. New job, new suitor, new plans for the future, new business deals, etc and recently I had been presented with a woman we will call "She-hater." Let me describe "She-hater" to you. She is slightly older than me, educated but a woman who seeks vindication through the approval of others. (As you can tell we are not bffs). Pause~ I know you must be thinking "Annie P is a hypocrite! Based on the fact that not too long ago, I dedicated a whole post about my love for the female race. However, when presented with someone who always is trying to steal your thunder...one must respond. Play~ So "She-hater" has recently heard about my new successes via the friendship grapevine and called me last night to speak to me and this is how it went.

She-hater: Hi heard about your new job...
Annie P: Hello to you too! How are you? I'm fine. Thanks for calling.
She-hater: [insert sarcasm] Well I guess if you are going to switch jobs that would be the place to go but
                like are you sure you're even built for that?
Annie P: Well I guess everyone cant count sugar packets all day like you dear.
She-hater: I have job security
Annie P: In the supermarket maybe
She-hater: Really [Annie P]?
Annie P: YUP!
She-hater: There you go cant even let this be a pleasant conversation
Annie P: Guess not...woe is me I am a bitter black woman that cant take a compliment. Why did you really
              call?
She-hater: To tell you that you should keep looking for a job.
Annie P: Thanks..bye hun!
She-hater: Before you go...
Annie P: Mmhmmm
She-hater: Are you partying this weekend?
Pause~ Funny thing about this alter ego Annie P is that those who HATE MY GUTS still want to know what I'm doing so they can tag along. Play~
Annie P: Not with you..buh-bye!

Now in the end of that conversation it was obvious that I technically "won." But in retrospect, I have come to the conclusion that I need to be a little more protective of myself. The fact is, being a sociable/fun/charasmatic person comes with a lot of hate. (For those of you who know this I know that you are shaking your head in agreement.) Furthermore, what really burns my biscuits is its not just the hate...with that comes rumors as well. Now for those of you who know women, you know that at the end of that conversation started a telephone tree to speak about how "terrible of a friend Annie P is." So as of today, I've decided to "Go to the mattresses!" Hate can no longer surround me! This is insane! Like how much more can a faboosh girl like me take?!!?...NOT A LOT THAT'S HOW MUCH!

So lesson of the day: Severing ties with silly small-minded people will make for better days! Bad seeds 
                                    lead to bad apples which leads to fruit flies!

Successfully yours,
The Faboosh Annie P.

The Birth of Annie P

As referenced in the previous post, I wanted to give you all a little insight on the name Annie P. I just realized that I never gave my readers any insight on where/what/when/how the name came about. So...the long and the short is, the name was created by a good friend of mine who we shall call Fatal Angel. Recently, [wait almost a year...(big smile)] she invited me to become a co-host on her Tuesday radio show [btw..you all should tune in http://www.bigfm95.com/ 6PM-9PM EST]. And on there, randomly, one day she said "This is Tasty Tuesdays with Fatal Angel and Annie P" and just like that the alter ego was created.

What's interesting about an alter ego is that 1) people begin to forget your real name 2) people do not realize you actually HAVE a real name and 3) the persona people think is created is NOT an actual persona (lol). So when speaking to my suitor over the weekend he stated that he had listened in on a random Tuesday and said he "could not believe" it was me. And then to boot, he continued to say that my social calendar was "something to marvel at." Hmm really? I guess with having a "persona" comes new responsibility; but really...how many people are walking around calling me Annie P? Not many I can assure you.  And why would that affect my dating life?

So in trying to end that awkward conversation, he told me he doesnt know if he can "date" a woman with two lives. And unfrotunately, that is not the first time I have heard that since I have become the newly single. So the answer I deliver Pause ~ Any answer to such a statement deverses the word "deliver" because they need to be served with why such an ignorant statement should never be said. Play ~ with "I dont have two lives I have two jobs! No different from a woman who is a Marketnig Executive and a mom. No difference at all... I have my career and my hobby. They are BOTH my responsibilities."

So this post is for all of the women out there are who making strides not only in the workplace but in the social space! Be who you are...alter egos are good for your soul. In my life it keeps things FRESH and ever-changing.

Larger than life,
Annie P (slash slash slash)

When to say when....

Over the weekend I was on the phone with my "suitor" [from post about annoying questions] and we began talking about when to say when in a relationship. Now this is an interesting topic to me because I am usually a straight shooter; but in the world of dating, I am very timid to have conversations like this because what if the answer you give is not appropriate? Or disliked? Or generally not understood?

Well in the midst of the conversation, he actually came to the conclusion that for a man (namely himself) you know its done when there is no more sexual chemistry there. NOW...I did hear this and ask for him to elaborate because I 1) wanted to make sure he wasnt being superficial and 2) he actually knew what he was saying. Well after about one full minute of explanation he was actually very serious. Then of course the question was directed my way. Pause~ My suitor is very aware of this blog. He is also very intrigued that I have a "stage name" that I go by [thats a story for another posting]. He actually joked that he would begin to sensor himself because he knew that random conversations would make it in. However, he was fascinated that I was so open about my new dating life with a "room full of strangers." So I had to educate him on the readership and how active you all are. Play ~ "Annie P when do you say when?" Hmm so readers, I thought and I thought and I thought and the exact answer I gave was "When I cant stand the sight of that stankin Negro."

Now the usual reaction to an Annie P tort such as the last one would bring instant laughter HOWEVER this man def did not feel that answer. Pause ~ do you realize why I do NOT answer questions like this?! Play~  So needless to say that conversation ended on a sour note because 1) I beg NO MAN/WOMAN/CHILD/BEAST/FRIEND/FOE/ANT/PEBBLE to understand me and 2) I just cant give a damn how he felt about my opinions.

However, I do pose this question to you all...When do YOU know when to say when in a relationship? Im intrigued to hear all three opinions (lol).

Hmm,
A Pondering Annie P

Blame It On The Rain

My apologies readers for the non-posting this weekend. I was definitely in a state of rest and relaxation being that I had zero down time between returning from my vacation and working. One thing that I can say is that when you take a weekend to yourself, there are things you learn to appreciate that you did not before. Therefore the love for today is something borrowed from a good good friend of mine: Treasured Moments!

So for those who do not know, I am part of a wonderful team of women entreprenuers that takes names and kicks butt on a regular day-to-day but thats a post for another day. Anyway, one of those ladies has her own business called Olivia's Treasures [www.olivastreasures.blogspot.com --- extremely worthwhile please check it out]. Anyway, if you know Annie P you usually know that I can easily become a needle in a haystack when it comes to the weekend. Between the errands, trying to hang out, taking "man" to work, getting to my mom's house, etc. I can become the hardest person to land down. So this weekend, I took it upon myself to really just chill and take a step back.

Now even though I was hanging loose...I did manage to get some things done.

Treasured Moment #1
But the best thing about this weekend was the fact that I got to COOK! Im not a big cooker...well scratch that...I am a cooker but only leisurely when its something I know I need to get done. However, this weekend the cooking bug bit me and I definitely took advantage. So Saturday morning, got up made a FABOOSH brunch and then for dinner re-created a wonderful fish fry all in my small Brooklyn kitchen.

Treasured Moment #2
Hanging out with mom! Now Mrs. Payne is a character full of foolie wag and nonsense; however, she is the black hole of time! My mother is one of those moms, who will call and say "Im going to the corner just follow me" and that will turn into a six hour ordeal of going everywhere to buy everything and pack it all away. Now usually I get frustrated because like every working professional, your weekend is time to catch up on all thsoe things you can not do during the week. But this time with mom was cool. We hung out, laughed, joked and then I got $20 out of it. So hmm...not a bad trade off in the end.

Treasured Moment #3
Hanging out at home with my good old cable box. Now granted, TV lacks good programming now a days; however, there is something to be said when you are laying in bed and just channel surfing. Nothing at all matters...just you, your bed, the remote and the TV. Now that was the most sublime 4 hours of my life.

So heres the picture of the day...

Not me persay...but that was my total motivation for the weekend.

Smooches,

The Relaxed Annie P

No Love This AM

This morning has been trying. Firstly, last night I had to have a moment to speak to my ex who we will name "man" to discuss the recent problems he has put me through. In the months that have passed, man and myself have been through severe ups and downs. BUT last night I hit my own personal breaking point. And without revisiting that side, I will just say that as a woman I made a decision and now the situation is being handled. But I digress...

So this morning I wake up dog tired for work Pause ~ I recently went on a great trip to Trinidad carnival. It was an amazing experience! The parties, the carnival, the people, the Johnny Walker...ahhh I just couldn't ask for more. However, the downside is you come back more tired than when you left. Play~ So I get in the bathroom and BOOM no hot water! Like seriously...my management company is the worst! I don't know what else to do. I call, complain to 311, and now I'm at the point to writing a letter to the company, the Brooklyn Borough President's office and the Department of Housing. These ignorant thieves must be stopped. So my love for today...NEVER UNDERESTIMATE THE POWER OF THE PEN!

There are very few archaic tenants that still exist in this life. For instance, letter writing, writing checks, talking on the telephone, etc etc. But one thing I have learned is that when there is a stern letter with multiple people CC'ed it is hard for anyone to ignore. And this lady here, Ms. Annie P, has no problem writing to anyone to let them know how she feels.

The issue is, I do not like being that complaining consumer; however, I do NOT like being taken advantage of. I work very very hard for the money I make and therefore, when I feel like someone is robbing me or taking me on a joyride I'm going to say something about it. Hence, today's letter to Urban American Management. By far the WORST management company in the five boroughs. To give you a sense of my pen lashing here is an excerpt:

     "At this point, these living conditions are simply not acceptable. To date, my payment history with
      this management company has been pristine. My rent is paid in full and well within the period, it
      should be. I do like my apartment; however, at this time I cannot continue to have basic amenities
      that were agreed upon in the leasing agreement ignored. As a result, I am writing this letter to
      inform this management company that I will be prorating my rent for the month of April due to
      the lack of hot water and heating in my apartment for three days."

In the end I may not hear from someone at UAM, however, I know that having these complaints on file at the Borough Presidents office as well as Department of Housing [because you know I will be sending this letter every week until someone answers me] Pause~ I used to work for a city agency; therefore, I know how to get their attention Play~ it will not look good for their record!

So lesson of the day: Write with conviction and confidence! There are people on the other side who will sympathize. They know what they are doing is wrong and sometimes they do not even know it is going wrong.

Well until next time,
Annie P (Consumer At Large)

Women....I Tip My Hat To You ALL

On my second post for the day, I have to take time to let you all in on my newest fascination...understanding the females and the society that surrounds them. So recently, due to the restrictions on my work computer have taken to reading a lot of opinion articles from major magazines, newspapers, etc. And the one conclusion I have come to is that Annie P is has so much love for every woman!

In the past couple posts I have brought you up to speed on my "declarations" and "affirmations" for this next phase in life. And precisely in my posts, I have even shed light on my lineage and my lovely friends. However, I'm going to take this post to focus on those who do not nearly get enough credit...WOMEN! There are many women in history, the present, my family that I simply admire; however, as a whole I've come to realize we (women) do not take the time to really be proud and all around amazed at the triumphs that we tackle everyday. For instance, in my current line of employment the ratio of men to women is 15 men to every one woman. That is a powerful statistic! It shows that 1) there are not many women who make it in this environment and 2) those that are here are here because they are DAMN GOOD at what they do. That is amazing to me! And now to be considered one of them lets me FURTHER know that I have arrived!

Moving past that, I want to shine some light to my single mom population. These women.....these women...these women....Hmm..where do I begin? I myself was not raised by a single mom (and I am forever grateful that my dad stuck around); however, I do have phenomenal women around me daily that are single moms. And when I say I am proud...I am PROUD to know them! Its something about watching your family member or friend finish work, come home, help with homework, cook dinner, play games and prep for the next day that makes you go..WOW how the hell does she do it? So I want you all to indulge me for a minute..

My Cousin
Single mom to a teenage boy whose father leaves nothing to be desired AT ALL. She is a successful educator, creator and all around very passionate woman. I have single handily seen this woman take out thousands upon thousands of dollars to make sure her son got the BEST education and attention needed in the school environment. Result: My little cousin is going to one of the best private high schools in the NYC area and is going for FREE!

My Good Good Friend
Single mom, business owner and all around cool person. Has a son with a dad; personally, don't know too much about the dad but what does that say about him. She gets up everyday cooks breakfast, packs lunch, runs her business, cooks AGAIN, chats with me during the day and then....wait...AND THEN does homework with her son,  and sends him to bed. This happens all before 9PM. Result: Student of Month and all around cool kid.

My Coworker
Single mom and lead recruiter at large fortune 500 company. Has a son and a daughter 11 months apart in age. The dad decided he didn't like her and in turn left her and the kids (PUNK). She gets up everyday at 4AM works out, cooks breakfast, prepares lunches, walks them to the bus stop, goes home gets dressed, works full 10 hour days, comes home to check homework, reads bedtime stories, reads the Bible and goes to bed. Result: Successful kids, amazing career and banging body!

My Wife aka Best Friend
Single mom with a a CRAZY baby daddy [Pause~ I hate that term baby daddy but that negro is a straight chump; hence the phrase]. Every morning she gets up, prepares breakfast and lunch, gets her two year old ready, dresses for work, drives 25 minutes to daycare, drives 35 minutes back to work, deals with customers, drives to daycare, drives home, deals with her "family," puts the baby to bed and THEN begins to organize life. Result: Awesome 2 year old son, up and coming career and cool as the other side of the pillow.

When I think about these women, I shudder to think that I actually do shit in the day. Like really...in comparison I don't do a damn thing! Sad to say but most women do more in their day that I do in two or three. Now don't get me wrong, Annie P works and works hard for the money; but, in the grand scheme of things I can only push myself to do more when I see other people do 10 times more than me.

Revelation for the day: Women lets support one another on this journey. For those who are able give a  
                                        piece of advice to another woman that can help her even in the smallest way. 

I am making this solemn promise to also let those women around me know how amazingly special they are to me! Because even though we may not speak everyday it can be something great to just let someone know I love you! You mean a lot to my life."

Well that's all I have to say about that!
Annie P - Up & Coming Woman

P.S. I know this is a photo blog; but I had this post written and couldnt cheat you guys anymore. The photos are coming soon....just cant seem to capture that essence I needed for this post. Soon come...