Borrowed Time...

Love: Hmm...[Silence]

One thing I realized that I didn't do yesterday was let you in on the details on "Ghana Revisited." I was going to save it for the date; however, I had an interesting interaction with him so why not.  GR is a little bit older than me (as in older than I would normally feel comfortable with), educated, in the medical technician field with one child. He was born and raised in Ghana and is very dedicated to his culture. Pause~ This is why I love people who appreciate other cultures. Because as you recall we met outside of a soca party. I'm not one to swoon but an open mind....(Sigh) Play~ Now...with all his African sexy he def has some archaic principles of marriage and life. Which is why on our first conversation I felt like I was speaking to Idi Amin! I was like oh no sir...But alas he kept talking and let me know that's the what he experienced not who he is. So I digress..

Last Night
Last night while working late on my deal at work, GR called. As stated before this man loves to talk. So when he called I was sincerely happy for the break. Anyway, he begins to talk and talk and talk and then he says "Are you listening?" Pause~ When I'm working or just busy, I am listening. However, you know I am working and I know I'm working....so if I'm not answering/participating I am listening intently to offer some semblance of participation later. Play~ So I answer and let him know "Of course I'm listening." Now I'm all for mindless talk sometimes. I usually bask in the revelry of talking a lot about absolutely nothing. But....hmmm all I really wanted from GR was some light conversation. Not the typical we just met conversation about life, love and the pursuit of happiness.

So in his haste to tell me that he wants a girlfriend and more kids I immediately stopped him and told him "Dude you are on borrowed time. Don't invest too much time in me because that's not where I am." Pause~ I really do want romance and all that; however, after "man" and that whole tirade I just do NOT have the energy to invest or be invested in. Play~ Well after saying that, GR was highly offended. Like HIGHLY! And really, I couldn't understand. What had I done wrong? Was it something I said? (lol). Well after that, he told me the following [Sidebar: I wrote it down for just this occasion].

"You women have no idea what it means to be committed to anything! Of all you want is work and success then buy a vibrator and don't pay men any mind."

Well......I....never.....

So after taking a pause to write that statement in my Moleskin aka My Red Poppycock Pause~ don't ask Play~ I politely said the following:

"Women are very happy to be committed. We are committed to a myriad of things like our careers, family, friends, hobbies, relationships and personal upkeep. If it bothers you that women don't revolve around you or appreciate 'your good thing' then that's something for you to access within yourself. For instance, a man told me I was fat. Simple as that. And after taking it in I did notice I could stand to lose a couple pounds so I did. As for that vibrator comment...don't wish such a thing on yourself. Double A batteries and a rabbit will beat you everyday and twice on Sundays."

Now...if you have been reading my blog (especially my response to Crix yesterday) you will know that polite is not my forte. However, I had to conduct myself this way because I wanted him to know that I am not the stereotypical West Indian black woman that will want to cuss up your ass at a drop of a hat. In the end he did apologize in some way or the other but it did lead me to ask the following question.

- Why do black women always have to fall in some "box" (angry or submissive)?

Anyway readers, I do not know how to appreciate GR yet. And I am still planning to go on the date. So we shall see.

Until next time,
Annie P